by Alistair Lindsay


From far and wide we've travelled this night

To honour a noble occasion

A splendid assembly who are here to delight

In celebration most amazin'


For 200 years many keen curling Dingers

Have played the great game to the foo'

At Haymarket, Kelso and other venues

But originally at the Hen Poo'


John Martin and family, real stalwarts have been

Very much so they make it their biz

To play the game well, on ice door or keen

There's Isobel, President Colin and Liz


While over past years the club fertile grew

Much helped by the family of Seed

Their members are down now to less than a few

Just Louise - but she is awfa' guid


Heaven help you if finances run a bit low

Or the balance sheet gets in a mess

It shouldna occur though as well we all know

There's a banker in charge, Paul Jess


Past President Colin Jeffries does play a mean game

This distinguished retired depute dominie

For his ruthless approach you could him rename

As curling's Ayatollah Khamenei


There's Edith and Eric and Rob as well

All three of the family Massie

They'd play their session right to the bell

With techniques both unorthodox but classy !


Your secretary here is dedication itsel'

He has a'body right on the hotter

His name is John Walker as we ken full well

But he really should be John Trotter


If there's any dispute - is a stane in or oot -

Robert Lamont will give balanced advice

Now there's two men called Taylor

Brian's a teacher - Ken's a sailor

Not guarding the coast now - just the ice


Tonight it's an honour to have in our midst

A young couple just fresh in from Fife

Royal Club President, Ainslie Smith

And Aileen his most charming wife


This is a selection of members old and new

For omissions folk musn't feel miffed

But writing this verse gets me in a right stew

Whether sober or three parts drunk


So all of you here in this 200th year

In the name of wick, takeout or rub

Fill up your glasses with wine, spirit or beer

And we'll give a toast to " The Club"