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by Alistair Lindsay
From far and wide we've travelled this night 
To honour a noble occasion
A splendid assembly who are here to delight
In celebration most amazin'
For 200 years many keen curling Dingers
Have played the great game to the foo'
At Haymarket, Kelso and other venues
But originally at the Hen Poo'
John Martin and family, real stalwarts have been
Very much so they make it their biz
To play the game well, on ice door or keen
There's Isobel, President Colin and Liz
While over past years the club fertile grew
Much helped by the family of Seed
Their members are down now to less than a few
Just Louise - but she is awfa' guid
Heaven help you if finances run a bit low
Or the balance sheet gets in a mess
It shouldna occur though as well we all know
There's a banker in charge, Paul Jess
Past President Colin Jeffries does play a mean game
This distinguished retired depute dominie

For his ruthless approach you could him rename
As curling's Ayatollah Khamenei
There's Edith and Eric and Rob as well
All three of the family Massie
They'd play their session right to the bell
With techniques both unorthodox but classy !
Your secretary here is dedication itsel'
He has a'body right on the hotter
His name is John Walker as we ken full well
But he really should be John Trotter 
If there's any dispute - is a stane in or oot -
Robert Lamont will give balanced advice
Now there's two men called Taylor 
Brian's a teacher - Ken's a sailor
Not guarding the coast now - just the ice
Tonight it's an honour to have in our midst
A young couple just fresh in from Fife
Royal Club President, Ainslie Smith
And Aileen his most charming wife
This is a selection of members old and new
For omissions folk musn't feel miffed
But writing this verse gets me in a right stew
Whether sober or three parts drunk
So all of you here in this 200th year
In the name of wick, takeout or rub
Fill up your glasses with wine, spirit or beer
And we'll give a toast to " The Club"